Croissant Breakfast Sandwich

 

✨ Ingredients:

  • 2 buttery croissants (store-bought, because who has time?)

  • 4 slices bacon or veggie bacon

  • 2 eggs

  • 2 slices sharp cheddar cheese

  • A handful of spinach (optional-ish)

  • A smear of cream cheese or garlic aioli if you’re feeling extra

🔥 Directions:

  1. Cook bacon until crispy (or almost burnt if that’s your thing).

  2. In a pan, scramble or fry your eggs how you like them.

  3. Slice croissants in half, add cheese to the bottom half and toast lightly.

  4. Layer egg, bacon, and spinach (if using), then close it up.

  5. Optional: wrap it in wax paper and pretend you got it from a bougie café.

💡 Hot Mess Tip: Forgot to buy croissants? Been there. Use whatever bread you have and call it “rustic.”

Fancy Yogurt Parfait

 

🛒 Ingredients:

  • 1 cup vanilla Greek yogurt

  • A handful of granola (the chunky kind, obvi)

  • A handful of berries (blueberries, raspberries, or whatever’s not mushy)

  • A drizzle of honey or maple syrup

  • Optional: chia seeds, shredded coconut, or a mint leaf if you’re feeling ✨ bougie ✨

📋 Directions:

  1. Grab your cutest glass or mason jar (yes, presentation matters).

  2. Layer yogurt, granola, and berries like a domestic goddess.

  3. Repeat the layers if you're feeling fancy.

  4. Top with honey drizzle and a lil’ flair (chia seeds, coconut, etc.)

  5. Snap a pic. Post it. Act like you didn’t almost use sour cream by accident.

💡 Hot Mess Tip: Use what you have. Crushed cereal counts as granola. Frozen fruit is still fruit.

DIY Mimosa Bar, Bougie Brunch Bar

✨ What You’ll Need:

  • A cute table or tray to set the scene

  • Carafes of juice: orange, pineapple, mango, cranberry

  •  Sparkling wine or fizzy lemonade (for that ✨sparkle✨)

  • A variety of fresh fruits: strawberries, raspberries, blueberries, orange slices, mint leaves

  • Clear glasses, mason jars, or whatever you have (bonus if mismatched = quirky chic)

🎀 Styling Tips:

  • Add a handwritten sign like “Sip Happens” or “Brunch, Baby!”

  • Use little bowls for garnishes and freeze fruit for pretty ice cubes

  • Pop in paper straws, cocktail napkins, or flower petals for ✨aesthetic✨ overload

💡 Hot Mess Tip: It doesn’t have to be perfect—just throw a cute towel under it and call it a vibe.

💁‍♀️ Meet the Woman Behind the Apron

Jennifer Barnes – Chief Chaos Coordinator, Snack Queen, and Brunch Enthusiast

Hi! I’m Jennifer—Leo sun, mom of four, lover of astrology, Taylor Swift, 90s country, and the occasional kitchen disaster that turns into a family favorite. I never really learned how to cook in the traditional sense. There was no culinary school, no handwritten recipes passed down from a southern grandma. Just me, some hungry kids, and a whole lot of trial, error, and takeout.

But here’s the thing—cooking became something more than just feeding everyone. It became how I showed up for my family. It’s in the late-night pasta after a long day, the boxed brownies turned birthday cake, and the messy brunches with too many mimosas and not enough napkins.

This book isn’t about being fancy or perfect. It’s about being real. It’s a love letter to anyone who’s ever Googled “how long to boil an egg” while holding a screaming toddler, a glass of wine, or both. So whether you’re here for the recipes, the stories, or the chaos—I’m so glad you are.

Let’s make a mess together. 💖